I was given a preview copy of Real Marriage last fall. Co-written by Mark Driscoll and his wife Grace, this is hands down one of the best books on marriage I have ever read. Sub-titled "The Truth about Sex, Friendship, & Life Together", it covers all of these topics most satisfactorily. It releases today in Canada, and high time too!
I did blush as I read, as in typical Driscollian fashion, Mark is very open and direct. I am quite shy about discussing matters of s - e - x in public places, but Mark is not. He and Grace have counselled thousands of folks over the years. It is out of those years of ministry to both the healthy and hurting that he and his wife have addressed issues that pre/post/currently married people will appreciate. Mind you, he pulls no punches. He is blunt and sarcastic, especially when referring to "boys that shave". Mark doesn't have much patience with them.
The pages contain a mighty call to MAN UP! Be the man, the husband, the father, the guy that God created you to be! Get a Bible! Get a job! Get a clue!
And both Grace and Mark speak frankly to women. Mark apologizes early on in the book for his harsh, dogmatic advice to women in his early days of ministry. His loving, growing relationship with his wife has clearly tempered his views and expectations. But he does not let us off the hook! There is no ambiguity about what he believes God is saying to women.
Both Driscolls recount stories of their life, love and learning together. Mark refers to himself as a high maintenance, drama queen of a husband. For years, Grace "served" him, all the while bottling up resentment and hurt. A victim of sexual abuse herself, she shares from the heart about how that experience affected her relationship with Mark. They write out of the depths of their pain and mistakes and personal process and rather than shaming us, they give us the gift of hope.
I love their emphasis on friendship. They would both agree that they are each other's best friend, and that close intimate friendship affects every other part of their marriage.
Watch Mark and Grace talk about their book, their marriage and the plans to take this message to the world. ~~Becky